How is it possible someone so seemingly godless begins to follow Jesus? Someone who up until December 2013 was quoting Richard Dawkins, John Atwell, Neil deGrasse Tyson, and some other individuals who are infinitely wiser than I. If these same brilliant minds have come to the consensus that there is no God than surely I should adopt the same mindset. Right?


I am also the same guy who started "Connect the dots - Abandon religion group". I have a history of being the bad guy. The antagonist who people enjoyed on "their" side. The ultimate backslider.

Before I dive into what caused me to have a change of heart I would like to provide some personal background into my life.

Growing up I believed in God with an unwavering faith. I didn't know there were alternate points of view. I hadn't been exposed to them yet. I attended service during the holidays with my family. Sometimes we would attend on a fairly regular basis and other times there were long gaps in between. 

My friends wanted to be fireman, sports players, and police officers when they grew up. I remember being proud to say I wanted to be a priest. 

Despite attending church on occasion, there was no real emphasis to read the bible. No push to truly understand the word and apply it in my own life. I didn't have any real foundation for my faith. The core components of my faith consisted of growing up being told there was a God, everyone else seemed to believe, therefor it was accepted. I would never have pondered otherwise.

I was even "born again" so to speak. Twice for good measure!  Berean Baptist and then again years later at First Baptist of West Palm Beach. I went through the motions. I said the prayer. I was saved!  All is perfect right?  Not entirely...

 
I didn't quite feel what others said I would. Any joy that was experienced during this moment was not long lived. Why did I not experience God like others? I didn't reinforce my faith. I didn't perform my spiritual due diligence. It's very easy to see why I faltered numerous times... An easy conclusion could be made that there is simply no God. Looking back I have concluded that it was my lack of faith. That was always my pitfall. Without the faith component it just didn't make any sense to me.
 
I stopped believing and started asking questions in my late teens. I spent the better part of 20 years  both online and browsing the philosophy sections of bookstores in search of a belief system I could subscribe to and become a part of. I have always searched for something bigger than myself.
 
I adopted the agnostic label and eventually atheist as my answer when asked if I believed in a creator. 
 
I then noticed the actions of certain religious leaders, pundits, politicians, etc. who claimed to be Christian, but acted in the most unchristian way imaginable. I let these individuals along with the majority of Christian's around me poison my view of Christianity. I didn't like people using the excuse to engage in immoral behavior and use Jesus as their scapegoat. Looking back it was unfair to stereotype an entire group based on the actions of those around me. 
 
Fast forward to several years ago when I started taking my photography more seriously and began spending countless hours in nature. I began finding this indescribable peace during my observations. The sky, the insects, the plants, etc. How perfectly orchestrated our environment is.
 
Nature had softened both my stance and my heart to the possibility of a creator. I have been making the declaration in my thoughts for quite some time that our surroundings and everything else was the result of more than chance.
 
Psalm 19:1 -  The heavens are telling the glory of God; they are a marvelous display of his craftsmanship.
 
One of my excuses in the past for not fully committing myself to God was I was too selfish to give up certain aspects of my life. I didn't want to make any modifications and if I couldn't at least make an attempt to do it the right way I wasn't going to even start. 

Fast forward to January 2014 at the age of 39. I looked at my life and realized I was making the same mistakes and struggling with the same issues, beliefs, or lack thereof. I had also experienced major obstacles in the prior 6 months and had an unbearable experience trying to cope with these events myself. 

I needed God in my life. I made some changes and there are more to come. I am ready to commit myself as the bible outlines. 

What made my re-acquaintance different from the off and on affair I have had with religion throughout my life? 

Faith... I believe I have conquered my lack of faith. I started building my faith by reading the bible on a regular basis. An effort was made to incorporate this new insight and apply these new principles to my own life. I worked through daily devotionals which allowed me to further research and gain a greater understanding of the bible. I am asking God for help daily and I am receiving the help and guidance I need. My life is changing for the better.

Luke 8:16 - Another time he asked, “Who ever heard of someone lighting a lamp and then covering it up to keep it from shining? No, lamps are mounted in the open where they can be seen."

I am sharing my testimony to satisfy the skeptics and doubters. I am not going to hide it. I am going to share it. I truly hope it will inspire you and allow you to find the same peace and happiness that,up until recently, I had never experienced.

My decision to follow Jesus was met with an enormous amount of opposition. My transformation has been a blessing and knowing how happy I am you would think my friends and family would have been congratulating me. I was instead met with opposition and
 attacked and criticised on an almost daily basis. My life as the ultimate skeptic was over. I am tired of questioning. I am happy to say I am focusing my efforts on believing.


Matthew 5:11 - “When you are reviled and persecuted and lied about because you are my followers—wonderful!

Finally. I met someone very special in my life and I will be forever grateful. Deanna and I crossed paths when I was already open to seeking God. She had mentioned early on that she and her daughter Selina attend Journey church http://www.gojourneychurch.com. I told Deanna that I was interested in joining them. There was no arm twisting or ultimatums. It was all a matter of perfect timing. God's timing. 

You can label me as weak, you can label me as a follower, you can label me as imperfect. And to these labels I will nod in agreement because they are all absolutely true.